He was 20 years old, and he couldn’t pronounce his r’s. The girl sitting next to him asked if he had an English accent. I cringed. He tried to speak like a businessman with his arms tightly crossed and a frown with every question, but he wasn’t employed. When I asked what he was up to this summer, he hesitated: “Just staying in Cha-ah-lestown.” My friend kept smiling at him like he was some superstar, but she, too, could barely understand him: “Living at home?” The Insecu-ah-e Boy nodded quickly, and a strand of dirty blonde hair fell out of his part. He leaned back a little further in his chair, corrected his posture and told us that he had never been in an apartment without a “doo-ah-man” before.
Spotted at an apartment in Alphabet City in New York, NY